I Gave up Today

Today was supposed to be a great fun day. The plans were for me to get home from work at 7:15, read Josh and Connors school books and help them with their homework, get Josh ready for school and take him to school, come home and try to catch a quick nap, then take a shower, get Kaytlynn and Connor ready and go to the Mom and Me fiedtrip at Jumpin' Jacks for Kaytlynns pre-school. I had plans to really go jump and play with her and Connor, not just sit and watch them like I usually do because I'm just too tired. That's why I wanted to catch a quick nap, so I wouldn't be too tired. I also wanted to get a shower so I wouldn't be stinky and possibly embarrass my kids. I was supposed to take a shower last night before work, but apparently my body wasn't happy with 6 hours of sleep and wanted to take that extra 35 minutes. I can't blame it because Sunday I got 4 hours of sleep in the morning after working all night, then went to my moms for dinner and to celebrate her and Brads birthdays, then came home and only managed to get an hour more of sleep before I went and worked all night from 11 to 7, then went straight to the post office and worked until 4:45. Then I went and picked up the kids, got them some dinner, ran to the grocery store, and went home and got 4 hours of sleep, once again my body deciding I needed a little more sleep rather then a shower. So then I went to work at 11 to 7 and got a call in the morning that the post office needed me to come in. I called around to see who could take the kids, went home, got the kids all ready, took Josh to school, took the kids to Wendys, went to do the auxillary route. I was starving, but just wanted to get it done. I got that done around 1:45, then went to pick up Kaytlynn. I had a nice chat with Wendy until 2:40--our chats always make me laugh. Then I went to pick up the boys from school at 2:45. Went and grabbed some McDonalds, went to the grocery store, went home and found the boys shin guards, found out I was supposed to call everyone on Connors team to remind them of the game, so I made whirlwind calls to 10 people. Then my wonderful step sister called so we could figure out my dad and Julies birthday party coming up. Brad went and picked up treats for soccer while I did that. Then we were trying to get both boys ready for soccer and Kaytlynn ready to go. They both played at 6:15 on different fields. Thank goodness they aren't playing at different parks this year, that was rough. Kaytlynn was being a little punk. She is such a hot blooded girl and is always hot. She will go into a frenzy because when she's hot, it also smells bad to her. I think breathing in the warmer, fuller air makes her think it stinks. She also decided she was hungry and the only thing she would take is mac and cheese. So I started making her mac and cheese 25 minutes before the game started. I thought I could quickly make it and take it with us, but Brad took the pot off the stove (and left the stove on!), so that didn't work. We finally got all the kids into the car and Kaytlynn started having a fit because she was starving but she would only eat mac and cheese. So I dropped Brad, Josh, and Connor off at 6:13. Brad ran Josh to his game, then ran with Connor to his game (which Brad is co-coaching) I took the starving, whining girl to Wendys. She did not want anything there, so I just got some chicken nuggets and some fries hoping she would stop being so stubborn and picky and be so starving that she would try something. When we dropped the boys off earlier, the entire parking lot was packed. There was not one spot left and the parking lot is pretty big. When we got back from Wendys, there were some spaces pretty close, so that was a positive. Also, the Wendys line was not that long, so another positive. So we got a spot, then sat in the car and luckily Kaytlynn tried the chicken and thought it was so good. Yay! Then it was a struggle trying to get her shoes on. She always puts her shoes on, whines "It feels funny." and then screeches and tries to kick them off in a rage. The shoe ordeal with her always takes a good 5 minutes with lots of whining, screaming, and crying. She usually ends up wearing no socks (which is why her shoes and then her feet stink!) and has the shoes on the wrong feet, but whatever. That is fine with me. So we got the shoes on and went to watch Josh's team play, since Brad was over helping coach Connors team. It was cold, so Kaytlynn huddled under the blanket. There was a cute little girl that came over and was staring at Kaytlynn. Kaytlynn put a scowl on her face and said "Why is that little girl staring at me? She just keeps staring at me!" scowling the whole time. I smiled at the girl, and she smiled back this cute, cute smile. I looked back at Kaytlynn who was still scowling at her. I told Kaytlynn to say "Hi, I'm Kaytlynn, what's your name?" or ask "How old are you?" or say "I like your jacket." But no, she just kept scowling. Poor little girl. Josh's game ended around 7:30. One of the apple juice boxes had leaked all over the other juices and snacks in the plastic bag, so I was dealing with that mess while Brad took Connor to the bathroom because he had to go so bad. I had to pick up Joshs soccer schedule, then figure out how to get all the garbage, treats, soccer balls, and cones, jackets, and kids to the car. I ended up putting all the soggy stuff in the grocery bag and taking all the soggy but still good stuff and folding it up in the blanket and hoisting the soccer and cone bag over one shoulder. Kaytlynn whined that she was cold and she wanted me to carry her, but that wasn't happening. So we made our way slowly to the car, freezing and whining. The boys slid down the slide a couple times and we made it to the car. Oh, yeah. I started feeling bad before the game--headache, sore throat, fever. Ug. So I went to spend time in the cold weather, blah! I just wanted to sleep. So we made it home and I slept for 6 1/2 hours. Did not get up in time for a shower, so still stinky from working at the post office. Got up and went to work at 3a.m. until 7, went home and started the daily struggle of trying to convince kids to do everything--homework, eat, get ready, brush teeth, go to the bathroom (None of my kids use the bathroom at school. They just hold it, yikes!) One of them usually ends up having to poo right as we are rushing out the door because we are going to be late. Bring on the lateness....you can't exactly not let them do that. So we are back to the plans I had for the day. Come home from work, do homework and reading, eat, get all ready, take Josh to school, take a short nap, take a shower, go refreshed to play with my kids at Jumpin' Jacks, take Connor to school, go back and have some mother/daughter time at Jumpin' Jacks, and pick the boys up at 2 (early out day) Then I was going to try to catch another little nap, get the kids fed, homework and reading done, go to a work meeting for an hour, eat dinner, then go to a Flash game at 7. We got the Utah County Pass of All Passes which gives us unlimited mini golf, laser tag, slick track racing, batting cages, Seven Peaks water park passes, roller coaster and other games, and tickets to every home game of Flash basketball and the Orem Owlz baseball. We have not gotten around to going to a Flash game and tonight was the last one. Since we weren't able to go to the Jazz game for Brads birthday, I thought we could all go to the Flash game and have a good time. I even got someone to cover my 11 to 3 shift. So here's how the day actually went. I got home at 7:15 and was talking to the kids. I looked out the window and saw the guy who carpools with Brad and realized I hadn't heard him up. So I went in and woke him up and he was mad at me for not waking him up earlier or setting the alarm for him. He got up and out the door. Then the kids ate and we were going to do homework and reading and get all ready for school, when all the whining and crying and fighting started. They all wanted me to do stuff for them, but I was trying to make Josh's lunch. The only lunch bag we had was a Dora lunch bag and Josh did not want that, so I was trying to turn it inside out and it was ripping. I didn't have any clean good knifes to cut up his apples, so I used a butter knife and Josh did not like the way they looked. We had to go through a pile of laundry to find clean socks. I think Josh's new soccer cleats kind of rubbed the back of his heel and it was a little red and hurt a little. No blisters or anything. I told him he needed to wear his other shoes, not his high top ones that were hurting him. He refused, because he likes those shoes and he said he will not wear his other shoes to school. Whenever he tried to stand up and walk, though, he was crying. I tried to bargain with him, and look at the problem intellectually, and have him come up with a solution to the problem. He was being so stubborn, and then he said, well, now I'm so late already, I'm not going to school. The whole time, Kaytlynn and Connor were whining and crying for stuff and fighting with eachother. I got very overwhelmed. My kids are so stubborn. I also remember going to school every morning with a red splotchy face because I had been crying because my mom wouldn't let me leave the house until I ate my oatmeal. I have Crohns disease and if I eat early in the morning, especially something scratchy like oatmeal, my stomach will hurt the rest of the day. Other bad things happen, too, but that's too gross to write, so we will leave it at it hurts. I don't want to have a struggle with my kids every single day they have to go school. I want everyone to be happy and with non splotchy crying faces when they go somewhere. So we were 20 minutes late by now, so I called the school and said that he was late. They said they'd just excuse him for the day and if he came he could go to the office and check in. Then Kaytlynn started whining and being a brat. First she didn't want to go to Jumpin Jacks with the kids in her class. Then she didn't want the teachers to be there, and then she didn't want me to go. Well, by this time I was already feeling pretty broken down, so why make it a stuggle to go and do something so fun? They were making me crazy and I put myself on a time out. I came in and layed in bed--depressed. The kids of course did not leave me alone. They kept coming in wanting stuff. We didn't go to Jumpin Jacks, I didn't even take Connor to school. I had them all home all day making messes everywhere. I lay in bed--got a little sleep and a little thinking done. Lots of whining, crying kids in and out all day. Josh missed school, Kaytlynn and I missed her jumpin jacks field trip, Connor missed school, I missed a meeting I had at 4, and we are currently missing the Flash game. Brad came home and was SO MAD at me because the house was a total mess and the kids didn't go to school.
I have ideas that I'm all excited about and when other people don't share my enthusiasm, it just crushes my idea and I don't have the desire or drive to make it happen. Just too tired. Well, tomorrow will be another day, so hopefully it goes more how I'd it like. Good night! for 2 hours til I have to go to work. Sorry for the rotten post!